Umbro Blog

Christmas Card

We’re gearing up for Christmas here at Umbro by sending out our Christmas cards, which you can see here. It took us a while to decide on the caption though, can you come up with anything better than our suggestions below? A hearty burst of seasonal cheer (and perhaps some football-related goodies) to the best suggestion we get…

“After Belmarsh’s captain spent 15 minutes trying to kick off using only the powers of his mind, the referee awards a free kick to Harrow.”

“Both teams waited anxiously for Shaun Wright Phillips to kick off.”

“But it was too late: the cement had dried and Terry “twinkletoes’ Woodstock was not going to have the impact he had on previous games.”

“Erm, can anyone see if that’s a head or a tails?”

From The Terrace

On 14 Dec 2009, at 11:55 am Chris Oakley wrote:

“We can’t start until we’ve found my contact lens. It shouldn’t take long…”
On 14 Dec 2009, at 12:14 pm seven46 wrote:

The referees’ expenses panel were highly suspicious of the lost shilling claim.
On 14 Dec 2009, at 12:36 pm Claudio CastroAnsieta wrote:

“Hey ref!, this guy has snow all over his feet! “
On 14 Dec 2009, at 12:41 pm Rich Johnson wrote:

That snow on your boots looks decidedly yellow…
On 14 Dec 2009, at 1:39 pm John D wrote:

Even by half-time at Robbie Fowler’s testimonial game, players were starting to get the fear.
On 14 Dec 2009, at 2:41 pm Graham Witcher wrote:

Due to snow, the referee decided to use the orange football.
On 14 Dec 2009, at 3:00 pm Chris Oakley wrote:

‘First ever ‘Spot the Ball’ competition fails to catch on’
On 14 Dec 2009, at 3:10 pm Andy Sanders wrote:

Wilkins knew it was a mistake wearing shorts on a bitterly cold day like this. Sure enough there were his nuts, lying in the snow between his feet.
On 14 Dec 2009, at 3:13 pm Rich Johnson wrote:

The Umbro Strait-jacket kit never did catch on…
On 14 Dec 2009, at 3:13 pm Ben Frost wrote:

The first pair of white football boots were actually trialled in 1955…
On 14 Dec 2009, at 3:22 pm Rich Johnson wrote:

It was several hours before someone told the players this was not blow football.
On 14 Dec 2009, at 3:27 pm davep wrote:

Global warming wrecks snow football match.
On 14 Dec 2009, at 3:30 pm Rich Johnson wrote:

The FA’s experiment with Magic Eye pitches got off to a bad start.
On 14 Dec 2009, at 3:48 pm Rob wrote:

For once, receiving a pair of “nice warm socks” from the mother-in-law sounded like an excellent Christmas present.
On 14 Dec 2009, at 4:21 pm Rich Johnson wrote:

The annual match between Foot Fetishists FC and Shoegazers United kicked off 2 hours late.
On 14 Dec 2009, at 5:11 pm ste wrote:

“I think the hair dryer will be out at half time”
On 14 Dec 2009, at 6:40 pm LOVE Blog / LOVE Creative Manchester » Blog Archive » Caption Competition wrote:

[...] Ever since those three guys turned up at the birth of Christ the world has been shaped by wise guys. (Wise girls, too. But for the sake of this post we’re focusing on wise guys.) Other wise guys of note from history include Genghis Khan, Oliver Cromwell, Wyatt Earp, Jean-Gaspard Deburau, Bill Gates, Daley Thompson, and let’s not forget the wisest guy of all, Paulie ‘Walnuts’ Gualtiere. Well if you head over to Umbro’s blog you’ll get your chance to prove you too are a genu…. [...]
On 14 Dec 2009, at 7:25 pm ken wilkinson wrote:

“Ref,I think you need to visit Spec-savers,this is a Christmas Pudding.”
On 14 Dec 2009, at 10:12 pm andy white wrote:

” Right, on the count of three, I’ll get his pants, you get his jacket…”
On 14 Dec 2009, at 11:31 pm Dave wrote:

“We could do with a new line painter, look at the state of my new boots”
On 15 Dec 2009, at 12:26 am Андрей wrote:

cooll
On 15 Dec 2009, at 12:28 am Fireball wrote:

1932 FIFA Snow World Cup, Poland v. Ukraine. Six months later the FIFA Beach Soccer World Cup was born.
On 15 Dec 2009, at 9:51 am Ben Bateson wrote:

Thinking they were playing on a snowy pitch, the players suddenly realise it’s actually glue.
On 15 Dec 2009, at 9:55 am James North wrote:

Suddenly they realised that playing in Columbia was a bad idea.
On 15 Dec 2009, at 11:36 am James Chapman wrote:

In the absence of adequate under pitch heating, players resort to defrosting the snow by trumping on it.
On 15 Dec 2009, at 12:13 pm Daniel Langhorn wrote:

The football wasn’t the only round object freezing….
On 15 Dec 2009, at 12:20 pm Daniel Langhorn wrote:

Their ‘tackles’ were coming up decidedly short following a cold snap….
On 15 Dec 2009, at 1:01 pm ken wilkinson wrote:

“Breaking news,for the first time ever, Ref calls of match due to a very bad case of Dandruff.”
On 15 Dec 2009, at 1:36 pm Vic Russell wrote:

‘I told you not to mark the lines out yourself’
On 15 Dec 2009, at 2:51 pm tim sinclair wrote:

“Ice to see you, to see you, ice!”
On 15 Dec 2009, at 2:57 pm tim sinclair wrote:

The Northern Sumo League was slow to catch on …
On 15 Dec 2009, at 3:27 pm tim sinclair wrote:

“‘Some people are on the pitch … they think it’s all over … it is SNOW!”
On 15 Dec 2009, at 6:32 pm ken wilkinson wrote:

“Looks like the Parachutist found the only soft spot on the Pitch.”
On 15 Dec 2009, at 10:13 pm Vic Russell wrote:

“One day they are going to pay us proper money for doing this”
On 15 Dec 2009, at 10:20 pm Vic Russell wrote:

Boxing Day football, a great british tradition
On 16 Dec 2009, at 12:31 pm Jim wrote:

With snow making the match unplayable, a young Harry Hill realises that there is, in fact, only one way to find out whose best… FIGHT!!!
On 16 Dec 2009, at 3:47 pm Rob Mortimer wrote:

“The short lived White Penalty Card makes it’s first and last appearance”
On 16 Dec 2009, at 4:24 pm Cris wrote:

Best Wishes for a Very Football Christmas. It will make all things Warmer.
On 16 Dec 2009, at 4:33 pm Cris wrote:

In the early days of football, the concept of warming up before a match was still to be fully developed.
On 16 Dec 2009, at 4:54 pm Vic Russell wrote:

“I’m sure the weather forecast said hot and sunny”
On 16 Dec 2009, at 6:43 pm Peter Oliver wrote:

The planned minute’s silence lasted much longer as players and referee are tragically frozen to the spot.
On 16 Dec 2009, at 7:32 pm Dave wrote:

Hypnotized FC nil, Straight jacket United nil
On 16 Dec 2009, at 7:59 pm Fireball wrote:

“Looks like Maradona sniffed the lines clean.”
On 16 Dec 2009, at 8:45 pm Vic Russell wrote:

Apparently subbuteo figures could bend after all
On 17 Dec 2009, at 8:12 am Anonymous wrote:

My Agent said its illegal to play in temperatures below 20 degrees
On 17 Dec 2009, at 5:23 pm Raverblue wrote:

This is snow joke, my mother said “Its the rein dear you have to cope with in Manchester” she never said anything about this stuff.
On 17 Dec 2009, at 6:19 pm ray woods wrote:

ha! ha! wearing white boots what will these overpaid players think of next…?
On 17 Dec 2009, at 9:39 pm ken wilkinson wrote:

Ref saying-”Come on Boys start tinkling like I have or we`ll never melt this snow.”
On 18 Dec 2009, at 11:03 am emma wrote:

Yes they are see through
On 18 Dec 2009, at 1:44 pm Umbro Blog – Back Of The Net: the finest football things on the web this week wrote:

[...] Competition on our blog. If you haven’t added yours yet, and you think you can do better than this lot, then head over there now… Share [...]
On 18 Dec 2009, at 3:09 pm Willie wrote:

PROPER CHR…UMBRO!
On 19 Dec 2009, at 8:17 pm Mark Nichols wrote:

“Hey…Look ref, He’s got those new Umbro Snow boots on”
Fergie: “They said it was difficult to see their team-mates at distance”
On 20 Dec 2009, at 12:06 pm Vic Russell wrote:

I knew we shouldn’t have asked for football kit for Christmas…
On 20 Dec 2009, at 1:34 pm ken wilkinson wrote:

“It`s no good trying to hide Mr Hughes,you`re still Sacked.”
On 20 Dec 2009, at 2:08 pm Heather wrote:

The latest tailored by Umbro kits, were clearly inspired by a good old fashioned LOOK!
On 21 Dec 2009, at 11:20 pm Fireball wrote:

“Jens, the pitch is not for urination. There are other ways to warm up your legs.”
On 22 Dec 2009, at 6:40 pm skip lei wrote:

Once it was comfirmed that the family dog had urinated on the ball, the kickoff had been rendered paralyzed……
On 23 Dec 2009, at 1:32 pm mike wrote:

My breast implants are freezing!
On 23 Dec 2009, at 9:26 pm Rob Falconer wrote:

That’s all we get for Christmas? – one bloody Malteser AND we’ve got to fight for it.
On 23 Dec 2009, at 9:55 pm Roman Bukur wrote:

“Hey, nice football boots” -ref

“Thanks, they’re Umbro” -player 1

” I want those!” -player 2
On 23 Dec 2009, at 10:51 pm Tim wrote:

“Sorry lads, but the FA rulebook clearly states we cannot kick off until the date in the caption. I make that just about 6 years to go, so you’d better do a few laps to keep warm…”
On 23 Dec 2009, at 11:19 pm Anonymous wrote:

The first trials with green footballs for snowy weather ended in failure.